I wanted to write about the sermon at church on Sunday...TrueNorth Church has started a marriage series that will go on for the next 4 weeks. I am so excited about these messages because I think we could all use a little refresher course every now and then. There are times when we take our spouses for granted and just expect them to be robots and read our minds. We as women need to realize that men just do not think like we do. They are not as complex in their reasoning and are not capable of automaticly knowing "what we mean", we must be straight forward with them and if we want something or feel a certain way, tell them! It doesn't mean that they will get us what we want or feel the same as we feel but it is a start. I love being married and I love my husband more than anything, and one thing I learned on Sunday is that I need to put my husband first (after God of course) and by respecting him and not having unrealistic expectations of him, our marriage will survive this crazy world. We have sure had our ups and downs and I am sure we will have more, but nothing is worth having that you don't work to get. If you think the grass is greener on the other side, think again, it is still just more grass that will die when the frost comes! I have posted the message notes from our pastor, it's a great read!
How to Wreck Your Marriage
Week 1: November 1, 2009Share
THE MESSAGE: Watch online at http://www.truenorthchurch.com./
Marriage can be crazy; especially when we embrace unrealistic expectations.
Do any of these sound like you?
-If our marriage is hard work, we must not be right for each other.
-I shouldn't have to change who I am to make our marriage better.
-My spouse is responsible for my happiness.
The truth is: marriage is hard work. Because your marriage is hard does not mean you do not belong together. We are different as individuals, and families, children and careers add to those differences. Where is hard work needed in your marriage? Spouses are constantly having to change for the betterment of the marriage. This is no different than improving in your career or anything else in your life. Marriage is two people coming together, helping each other change. What is it in your marriage that that needs to be changed? Although only Christ will complete you, your spouse is there to compliment you. However, your spouse is not responsible for your happiness. We need to be committed to the person, and not the expectations.
Our expectations are born as natural desires in our hearts, and when realistic are very rewarding. Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life (Proverbs 13:12). How do spouses merge the pictures of their expectations? By being aware, reasonable and clear about what they expect, and through their willingness to listen to the Lord. Have a tender heart towards God. Nehemiah 4:14 tells us to remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and to fight for our wives and homes. Satan is the enemy to your marriage, and fighting for is vital to its longevity.
Marriage is going to take hard work. It means giving time, energy and sacrifice. Keep these things up with your spouse.
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